TIVO Kills
The advent of the DVR is another nail in the coffin for the television commercial. This unfortunately means a lot less work for some really clever people including (although I hesitate to call myself one of the clever ones) yours truly. Part of me (the part that enjoys making a living) thinks this is a shame as I look back on my countless hours on a commercial set with great fondness.
Readers who have no experience in the commercial industry might think that making what essentially amounts to a thirty-second film is relatively easy. Those readers would be wrong. The effort involved in selling for instance, paper towels, is equal to if not greater than that required to not only put a man on the moon but ensure he has the right toothpaste when he gets there.
The stakes are always incredibly high and every decision is not only agonized over but requires more approvals than the average bill making its way through Congress. College educated adults will debate the ramifications of the color of pillows on a couch deep in the background of a set for hours while others will argue about whether or not a house chosen for a location is “aspirational” enough (yes the house aspires to be a mansion). This may sound bizarre but I assure you the list of such things is endless. Whether it’s the variety of tricks used to make food look appetizing or the detailed instructions about the proper way to shoot an actor putting gum into his mouth, there is simply no shortage of absurdity, all in the name of advertising, on the commercial set.
Of course the other part of me (the part that writes this blog and is also partial to pizza - though not any pizza seen in a commercial) applauds this turn of events. That same part almost feels sorry for the advertisers who have labored for years under the assumption that I, and no doubt the rest of the public, care about the color of the pillow on the couch in the background. I don’t. And these days, thanks to the DVR, I’m not watching your commercial at all. Instead I’m fast-forwarding through your pillow and couch with my thumb firmly planted on the Tivo remote. The odds of me stopping during a commercial are similar to those of Brett Favre retiring. There is always the possibility but in the end it just doesn’t happen.
Even if I were to sit through a spot it certainly wouldn’t influence what I buy or whom I vote for (politicians are you listening?). I won’t buy a certain SUV because it looks great crashing through a stream nor will I purchase a truck because it can tow something like the space shuttle. The fact is, I can’t remember the last time I needed to drive through a stream of any size and I’m quite confident the shuttle can get around without my help.
Come to think of it, there are a few more things that advertisers should know. First, no amount of bikini-clad women will ever convince me to drink one beer or another (although I reserve the right to drink said beer if a dozen or so of these women miraculously appear at my doorstep). Second, no amount of celebrity endorsement will sway my decision to buy a particular shampoo, cell phone, cereal, or other product. You should also know that I’m quite happy with my car insurance already and have no intention of wasting even five minutes on the matter. And lastly, if you ever find yourself in a meeting where a decision is made to have singing in a commercial for anything at all, you should run. And don’t stop until you can find the fast forward button for your life. I could go on but NASA just called and it seems I’ve got to go tow the space shuttle.