Chance
Since the election, I’ve occasionally read on social media that we really should give the newly elected (by the Electoral College but not even close in the popular vote) so-called President a “chance.” A chance I thought? After all of the despicable things he said and did during the campaign, he gets a chance? Then because my mind works in a free associative kind of way, I thought of the “Chance” cards in Monopoly.
Truthfully, Monopoly was already on my mind. I’ve also just read that Hasbro is getting rid of the Thimble. What? This is blasphemy. I worry that next they’ll be turning the hotels into condos or worse, AirBNBs. Monopoly was always one of my favorite games, although as I recall, it was often difficult to finish a game because the average length of a Monopoly game is roughly the same amount of time it takes to earn a college degree.
But that was then. Here in the present, my untamed mind, as it is wont to do, bounced back and forth between a “chance” for the Un-President and the board game from my youth. I thought about my favorite deeds (the purple ones) and my favorite Community Chest Card (Bank Error in Your Favor! Collect $200). The bank error card (which has never ever happened in real life) took me back to the Chance cards. It occurred to me the only appropriate Chance card relating to the new administration would be “Go Back 3 Spaces.” Maybe Hasbro can change that to “go back 50 years”?
Once my mind settled on the idea of chance, I gave it some thought. When W won, I certainly wasn’t happy about it but I did give him a chance. That obviously did not turn out so well. Although I’m glad I didn’t have to, I’d like to think I would have given Romney a chance. I might even have given a chance to John McCain had he managed to win. However, the thought of his dimwitted, half-term, Alaskan, grifter of a running mate being a heartbeat from the oval office would have terrified me. But now, after only four weeks of what appears to be the amateur-hour approach to governing, it’s hard to see how this new guy deserves a chance to run a Taco Bell franchise, let alone a nation.
For me, in addition to the afore-mentioned despicableness, his casual (bordering on nonexistent) relationship with the truth disqualifies him from getting any kind of a chance. It can’t be a good sign when even Fox news has begun to point out his constant lying. Fox has also called him out on his never-ending war with the media. After the Un-President tweeted that the media was “the enemy of the American people, Chris Wallace declared that “he crosses a line” with that tweet. Which means that for once, I’m agreeing with Fox. Yikes!
He whines about “fake news” and continually talks about the dishonesty of the media but stops short of providing actual evidence of this dishonesty. On top of that, he regularly promotes stories that are just that, stories. In his bizarre, unhinged press conference last week, the Un-President again touted his Electoral College margin as the largest since Ronald Reagan. When a reporter pointed out this was simply not true, the So-Called-President laid the blame elsewhere saying, “I was told, I was given that information.” This is not someone who deserves a chance. It’s actually someone who might need psychiatric help.
He can’t seem to give up on his popular vote lie either. He has repeatedly maintained there were 3-5 million illegal votes cast (every one apparently for Hillary Clinton!) and even went so far as to claim that thousands of illegal voters from Massachusetts were bussed into New Hampshire to vote. So far, he has provided not one shred of evidence for any of these assertions. In my book (and I do have one), someone who complains about fake news but actually is the one generating fake news does not get a chance.
Also, like a lot of people, I keep thinking about those tax returns. While it’s tempting to say I’d give him a chance if he shows us his tax returns, I’m sure even then I’d be unable to do it. Plus, the fact that he hasn’t done so makes me think he’s “что-то скрывает” (Which apparently is Russian for “hiding something”). And I also think it’s quite possible that if those returns ever become public, the appropriate Chance Card might then be “Go Directly to Jail.”
“Go Directly to Jail” naturally leads me to “Do Not Pass Go” which then takes me to, “I could Go on and on.” These are the perils of a free associating mind. Instead I’ll leave it that although, just like when I was a kid, I’m still a little worried about drawing the “Make House Repairs” card. Meanwhile, if you need me, I’ll be looking through my bank statement. There has got to be a bank error in my favor somewhere.
